Maybe There Is Some Accounting For Taste

My favorite singer is Rich Mullins.  He said, and I've posted this before, is that when you're writing a song, you take sentiments, and market them.  "But no matter how cheap my words become to me, the truth is still the truth."

Every hit song that ever topped the charts, if it wasn't one of the funny songs, had some deep truth to it, set perfectly to some chords of music.  At least, in country and Christian radio.  I don't listen to pop or rock or rap, so I don't know.  But for those two genres, it's a sure thing, or it always seemed so.

I think back to some overplayed songs.  "I Can Only Imagine."  "Who Am I."  "Grace Like Rain."  I feel a little bad I can't think of more.  At any rate, I couldn't stand the first two.  I still don't care for "I Can Only Imagine."  I'm also not a big fan of MercyMe or Casting Crowns.  I love Todd Agnew's music though.

I don't know why I always liked Rich Mullins, but I know why I appreciate his music now.  First of all, the compositions--the music itself--is beautiful.  The blend of instruments and the rhythms.  I'm pretty sure I could just listen to the instrumental versions of those songs.  And then you add these lyrics of the reckless raging fury that they call the love of God.

Enter in the Ragamuffin Band.  Rick Elias sings of the Man who loved the weak with relentless affection.  Mark Robertson sings of this man who the whores loved and the drunks proposed a toast to.

As I've said in my last post, I've lived a pretty good life.  I think a reason I don't like a lot of singers/songs is that I can't relate to it.  I've never been hurt so hard I've held a grudge for years.  I had a happy childhood.  I grew up in church listening to Revelation sermons.

Overall, a pretty peaceful existence, in it's own chaotic, everyday way.

...and then I started reading and not caring what other people thought.  When I was younger, it wasn't cool to read, so I didn't.  Still not cool, but I do it anyway.  Then my uncle got me three books for Christmas one year, seventh grade, late 2004, and then I just stopped caring what other people thought.  Well, I don't think I ever did, but that was asking to get picked on, and I don't think I had friends that really approved of it.  Anyway, I stopped giving a darn.  I wanted to read about dragons and ghosts and fairies and all that fun stuff.

...and then I figured out I liked writing.  I wrote stories before then, but sporadically.  Something clicked through September-November of 2005.  It probably had something to do with being bumped from baby of the family into middle child limbo.

That's when the unbalance started, or maybe I was always unbalanced, and I just didn't know it until I started reading and writing.  There's still a debate on whether writing makes you unbalanced, or your unbalance makes you write.  For the record, crazy runs in my family.

Anyway, I like songs about people who have lived through struggles, but they don't speak to me on a level that they would someone who had lived through it.  And as far as country music...I've never been in a relationship and a lot of country music is love songs, and I have my fair share of favorites.  There used to be a time where I didn't care.  They are beautiful sentiments.  Now it just bugs me because I have no one to think about.  I don't even crush anymore.  Thus, I don't listen to it nearly as much as I used to.  (Which is funny, because I still read romances.)

With Rich Mullins, it's not something you have to relate to.  Or you can, but it's universal.  It's Everyman.  My friends don't care for him.  He puts them to sleep, he's too slow, you know.

-Cesar Cruz

That's what I like about him.  He's peaceful.  I have enough going on in my own mind without listening to a song that's supposed to be entertainment anyway.  I need peace.  It's fine to listen to "Do Something" by Matthew West in the car.  If I'm comfortable, I need to be disturbed.  But when I'm writing/thinking about my story, which is most of the time, I want to be comforted.

Rich Mullins [and the Ragamuffin Band] is probably the only singer I can really write to.  (I can write to instrumental music.  There's something about trying to keep up with a tune by one of the masters that gets the words out.)   Rich Mullins was my first foray into Christian music, and you never forget your first.  I've listened to country my entire life.  I've known the words to "Should've Been A Cowboy" and "Ten Thousand Angels" for as long as I can remember.  I've been listening to Rich Mullins since I'm six or seven, and this was after his death.  That doesn't seem like a long time, and it's not, but that's still most of my short life.

At the beginning of Paul's letters in the New Testament, he says, "Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ." (HCSB)  Those are some of my favorite verses.  Rich Mullins has a song called, "Peace."  It's a communion blessing.  Sometimes I think the entire song was based upon those verses.  The intro has a full minute of music.  And the lyrics do what it should to a disturbed person:  they calm.

And may peace rain down from Heaven

Like little pieces of the sky

Little keepers of the promise

Falling on these souls

This drought has dried

In His Blood and in His Body

In the Bread and in this Wine

Peace to you

Peace of Christ to you

It's Because I'm a First World White Girl, Isn't It?

Job hunting in this economy is

1) a job in itself

and

2) depressing.

Not to mention I listened to my parents when I was in high school and didn't work then.  So, there's the no-experience issue too.

I hate the assessments.  Hello, it's a fast food place.  Most people get their starts there.  IT'S FAST FOOD. Really?  An assessment?

Why yes, I can say, "May I help you?"

One thing that always knocks me out are the "These will not affect your application."

Sex:

Female.  Strike one.  I don't care how far we've come, I still think it's harder for females to get jobs than it is for men, unless it's teaching/nursing, whatever.

Race/Ethnicity:

I'm white.  I'm actually more Native American than white, but I'm no longer registered with the former tribe, nor do I look it.  I look white.  Strike two.  We're all about diversity and the white people are no longer allowed.  Sometimes I put Native American.  I never hear from that either.  Wait till I get registered with a recognized tribe...  Then it's tanning, and I'm dying my hair black, keeping it straightened, and I will look Indian, gosh darnit.

Military:

I haven't served in the military.  I need something that pays my bills, thank you.  God bless our military, but not for me.

Have you ever received SNAP benefits/Welfare/are you a bum?

My dad actually did something with his life.  I've never known need or want.

While I'm at it, I come from a traditional family with a mom and a dad, some property and a dog and some cats.  Still, I would like to move out the house some day.

Would it help if I was a teen mom or on WIC or something?  Single parent household?

Criminal background?

No.  Please, I'm still a virgin, never smoked a cigarette (I'm old enough to now and still haven't), don't drink, and never even had discipline problems at school.

Again I wonder, would this help if I did have a criminal background?

In the meantime, I've been writing and reading and applying.  I'm considering going back, but college is expensive.  I fall into the "too rich for financial aid, but too poor to pay for college" section.  Daddy's tax dollars sends other people to college, can't send own daughter to university.  Screwy.  Don't get me started on that one.

Anyway, as Naren's wont to say, life's not fair.  And since it's not, well... here we are.

Welcome to America.

L'amour de Dieu est folie!

Easter, I've said many times, is my favorite holiday.  Today is Good Friday, and I finally got the idea for my Easter post.  Like usual, it spurns from my current writing project, the same one that gave me the idea from two years ago.

Adam came, betrayed God in Eden, fell, and so on.

Jesus is often referred to as the second Adam.  He came, lived, got betrayed in Gethsemane, died, and came back.

This isn't backed up by any Scripture that I know of, but I've read (in a fiction book {in a Christian fantasy book, while we're at it}) that Adam ate the forbidden fruit because when he knew Eve did, she'd have to leave.  He did it to be with her.  He left Paradise.  Even if it meant death.  

It wouldn't have been Paradise without her anyway.

You can say it's crazy.  It is.  

Jesus left Heaven, lived a normal human life, and died for His bride.  Would it be heaven for Him if His bride wasn't there?  Even if He had to die to be with her?

Still sounds crazy?  Yep.

"Should you ever have the opportunity to celebrate Easter in France, whether it be a large metropolis such as Paris, Bordeaux, or Lyon, or a small village such as Saint-Remy (where I lived for six months), you will see one phrase written on the walls of buildings or the sides of buses in script or black print.  You will hear it exchanged as an Easter greeting as people pass on the street:  "L'amour de Dieu est folie!"--The love of God is folly."
-Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel

Thank God.

The Four Creations - A Hopi Creation Story

I'm reading Creation stories for a writing project.  I'll be reading other stuff too, scientific theory, history, and all that, but I love my myths.  I'm not entirely sure I'll pursue it, but I will let you know if I do.  It depends on whether I can organize it enough and if I can dedicate enough of myself to it to do it.  It may get its own blog.  I may have a running series here.  Who knows?

Stories have a way of speaking to us in ways other things can't.  Whether it's by way of a paintings, movies, books, fairy tales, songs, or one of Grandma's recollections, story appeals to us.

So, I found a whole page of Creation stories.  This is the first one I've read.  It reminds me why I love stories.  It's something to chew on.

(source)
"This story comes from the Hopi people of northern Arizona. "Hopi" means "People of Peace". The stories here were recorded in the 1950s by Oswald White Bear Fredericks and his wife Naomi from the storytelling of older Hopi at the village of Oraibi, which tree-ring dating indicates has been inhabited by the Hopi since at least 1150 AD." 
    

The Four Creations

      The world at first was endless space in which existed only the Creator, Taiowa. This world had no time, no shape, and no life, except in the mind of the Creator. Eventually the infinite creator created the finite in Sotuknang, whom he called his nephew and whom he created as his agent to establish nine universes. Sotuknang gathered together matter from the endless space to make the nine solid worlds. Then the Creator instructed him to gather together the waters from the endless space and place them on these worlds to make land and sea. When Sotuknang had done that, the Creator instructed him to gather together air to make winds and breezes on these worlds.

      The fourth act of creation with which the Creator charged Sotuknang was the creation of life. Sotuknang went to the world that was to first host life and there he created Spider Woman, and he gave her the power to create life. First Spider Woman took some earth and mixed it with saliva to make two beings. Over them she sang the Creation Song, and they came to life. She instructed one of them, Poqanghoya, to go across the earth and solidify it. She instructed the other, Palongawhoya, to send out sound to resonate through the earth, so that the earth vibrated with the energy of the Creator. Poqanghoya and Palongawhoya were despatched to the poles of the earth to keep it rotating.

      Then Spider Woman made all the plants, the flowers, the bushes, and the trees. Likewise she made the birds and animals, again using earth and singing the Creation Song. When all this was done, she made human beings, using yellow, red, white, and black earth mixed with her saliva. Singing the Creation Song, she made four men, and then in her own form she made four women. At first they had a soft spot in their foreheads, and although it solidified, it left a space through which they could hear the voice of Sotuknang and their Creator. Because these people could not speak, Spider Woman called on Sotuknang, who gave them four languages. His only instructions were for them to respect their Creator and to live in harmony with him.

      These people spread across the earth and multiplied. Despite their four languages, in those days they could understand each other's thoughts anyway, and for many years they and the animals lived together as one. Eventually, however, they began to divide, both the people from the animals and the people from each other, as they focused on their differences rather than their similarities. As division and suspicion became more widespread, only a few people from each of the four groups still remembered their Creator. Sotuknang appeared before these few and told them that he and the Creator would have to destroy this world, and that these few who remembered the Creator must travel across the land, following a cloud and a star, to find refuge. These people began their treks from the places where they lived, and when they finally converged Sotuknang appeared again. He opened a huge ant mound and told these people to go down in it to live with the ants while he destroyed the world with fire, and he told them to learn from the ants while they were there. The people went down and lived with the ants, who had storerooms of food that they had gathered in the summer, as well as chambers in which the people could live. This went on for quite a while, because after Sotuknang cleansed the world with fire it took a long time for the world to cool off. As the ants' food ran low, the people refused the food, but the ants kept feeding them and only tightened their own belts, which is why ants have such tiny waists today.

      Finally Sotuknang was done making the second world, which was not quite as beautiful as the first. Again he admonished the people to remember their Creator as they and the ants that had hosted them spread across the earth. The people multiplied rapidly and soon covered the entire earth. They did not live with the animals, however, because the animals in this second world were wild and unfriendly. Instead the people lived in villages and built roads between these, so that trade sprang up. They stored goods and traded those for goods from elsewhere, and soon they were trading for things they did not need. As their desire to have more and more grew, they began to forget their Creator, and soon wars over resources and trade were breaking out between villages. Finally Sotuknang appeared before the few people who still remembered the Creator, and again he sent them to live with the ants while he destroyed this corrupt world. This time he ordered Poqanghoya and Palongawhoya to abandon their posts at the poles, and soon the world spun out of control and rolled over. Mountains slid and fell, and lakes and rivers splashed across the land as the earth tumbled, and finally the earth froze over into nothing but ice.

      This went on for years, and again the people lived with the ants. Finally Sotuknang sent Poqanghoya and Palongawhoya back to the poles to resume the normal rotation of the earth, and soon the ice melted and life returned. Sotuknang called the people up from their refuge, and he introduced them to the third world that he had made. Again he admonished the people to remember their Creator as they spread across the land. As they did so, they multiplied quickly, even more quickly than before, and soon they were living in large cities and developing into separate nations. With so many people and so many nations, soon there was war, and some of the nations made huge shields on which they could fly, and from these flying shields they attacked other cities. When Sotuknang saw all this war and destruction, he resolved to destroy this world quickly before it corrupted the few people who still remembered the Creator. He called on Spider Woman to gather those few and, along the shore, she placed each person with a little food in the hollow stem of a reed. When she had done this, Sotuknang let loose a flood that destroyed the warring cities and the world on which they lived.

      Once the rocking of the waves ceased, Spider Woman unsealed the reeds so the people could see. They floated on the water for many days, looking for land, until finally they drifted to an island. On the island they built little reed boats and set sail again to the east. After drifting many days, they came to a larger island, and after many more days to an even larger island. They hoped that this would be the fourth world that Sótuknang had made for them, but Spider Woman assured them that they still had a long and hard journey ahead. They walked across this island and built rafts on the far side, and set sail to the east again. They came to a fourth and still larger island, but again they had to cross it on foot and then build more rafts to continue east. From this island, Spider Woman sent them on alone, and after many days they encountered a vast land. Its shores were so high that they could not find a place to land, and only by opening the doors in their heads did they know where to go to land.

      When they finally got ashore, Sotuknang was there waiting for them. As they watched to the west, he made the islands that they had used like stepping stones disappear into the sea. He welcomed them to the fourth world, but he warned them that it was not as beautiful as the previous ones, and that life here would be harder, with heat and cold, and tall mountains and deep valleys. He sent them on their way to migrate across the wild new land in search of the homes for their respective clans. The clans were to migrate across the land to learn its ways, although some grew weak and stopped in the warm climates or rich lands along the way. The Hopi trekked and far and wide, and went through the cold and icy country to the north before finally settling in the arid lands between the Colorado River and Rio Grande River. They chose that place so that the hardship of their life would always remind them of their dependence on, and link to, their Creator.

Here's Some Thoughts for You:

1 - It seems to me that the people who are for gay marriage are also the ones for abortion.

Gay couples can't have kids naturally, and it's okay to kill a naturally begotten child (rape notwithstanding).

Pardon the harshness, but no respect for the natural balance = no respect for life.

2 - It doesn't matter how "enlightened" we think we are.  If you look over the course of America's history, we were at our happiest (read:  prosperous) when we were one nation under God.  Not happy because we were selfish or put our own needs above our own, but because we did what was best.  No wonder we're in deep crap.  We turned away from God, and He turned away from us.

I'm a big fan of the Enlightenment Era.  While I was doing some reading up on what the Enlightenment did to Christianity, I came across this:

"If, for example, personal happiness is our overriding goal, what will happen if we decide our spouse is making us unhappy? What will happen if our children are making us unhappy? What is likely to happen when a pregnant woman decides that her pregnancy has come at a bad time? We should not be at all surprised to find a high divorce rate, countless neglected or homeless children, a low birth rate and a high abortion rate in such a society. This is the natural consequence of making the right to be happy the supreme right."
-David Quinn, "Did 'the Enlightenment' K.O. Christianity?"

It's actually an interesting article all the way through, but I like this point here in this paragraph.

So, While the World's Going to Hell...

Disclaimer:  I don't know my Bible that well.  These are just some thoughts.  Expect some tongue-in-cheek.

I'm trying to recall a time when Jesus said, "Fight for what you believe in," or something along those lines.

What I do remember:

The meek will inherit the earth.

When are we ever taught to be meek?  I don't recall meekness lessons.

Love your enemies and pray for those who torment you.

This goes against every human impulse we have.

Whoever tries to save his life will lose it, but who loses it for Me will find it.

Christianity loves its martyrs.

Suffer the children, and have a faith like theirs.

Must I?  I dislike children, and I'm far too cynical to have a child's faith.

God appoints world leaders, and you are to submit to their authority.

What?!  No!!!

Given the state of affairs of the US today, part of me says, "Well, we should be fighting against gay marriage and abortion and socialism..."

Another part says, "Well, the sooner the world gets worse, the sooner God can come back.  Do nothing.  Why save a world God said He'd end?"

The last part goes in with the previous part, "Well, the sooner the world gets worse, the sooner God can come back.  Pray.  Evangelize, et cetera."  Homosexuality isn't the problem.  An unwanted pregnancy is not the problem.  Laziness is not the problem.  The human heart, the human mind, sin is the problem.

You are born "bad," you must be taught to be "good."

We're taught about the power of prayer and why it's important to share Jesus (this must be where they forgot the meekness lessons).  For those of us who grow up in church, we understand this from an early age.

Come boldly to the throne of Grace.

I can't find where it says, get in someone's face and call them a sinner and tell them they're going to hell.  There's a part about reprimanding your brother in private.  (Private?  What's that?)

“We do not find happiness by being assertive. We don't find happiness by running over people because we see what we want and they are in the way of that happiness so we either abandon them or we smash them. The Scriptures don't teach us to be assertive. The Scriptures teach us—and this is remarkable—the Scriptures teach us to be submissive. This is not a popular idea.”
-Rich Mullins

Oh, don't act surprised, you knew a Rich Mullins or Brennan Manning quote was coming.

So, my question is this:  Do I fight against gay marriage and abortion and gun control or do I get on my knees and pray for a change of a person's heart, and while I'm at it, a change in my own heart?

Just something to think about.

By Darkness Revealed by Kevin O. McLaughlin

Goodreads Synopsis: Ryan Blackwell thought to escape his magic by burying himself in the military college at Northshield, Vermont. Instead, he finds himself in the midst of a deeper and more dangerous sorcery than he has ever encountered before. Suddenly, only Ryan's wit, will, and the talent he once hoped to leave behind stand between a nightmarish creature and everything he cares for.


By Darkness Revealed by Kevin O. McLaughlin
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
I bought this book several months ago--or downloaded it because it was free.  At any rate, I saw it, was interested, and had to get it.

When I finally sat down to read it, I was not disappointed.  It's not a long book, and it reads fast and the action stays moving.  It met and exceeded expectations.

I cheated and did my Goodreads copy-paste thing.

Now, this book is a load of OH MY GOODNESS, THIS IS FREAKING AWESOME.  I don't know.  There weren't many typos and it's kind of creepy, but it kept my attention.  I read it in two days.  One hundred twenty pages isn't a lot, so the length was an added bonus.

And, I'm a sucker for a good ending, and it ended splendidly.

Here's the Amazon link.  Read it.

Did you hear the one about the masochsitic insomniac?

I scare really, really easy.  I've never even seen a horror movie.  I don't read a lot of horror novels either, which is pathetic considering the amount of Stephen King books I have.

There's this book I got for Kindle several months ago.  It's been sitting there, on my device.  I've been wanting to read it.  I liked the cover.  I liked the synopsis.  It looks like everything a book should be.

And then I started reading it tonight.  Last night?  I started it before midnight, and it's a little after 1am here in the Central Time Zone.  I got a quarter of the way through, granted there's not extras at the end of the Kindle book.  I don't know if it was self-pubbed, although I do think it's a debut novel.

It's freaking scary.  I thought it was a fantasy novel--which it is, but it's scary.  You know that part in the scary movie when the music changes?

That's the part where I run out the room crying.  And this book is one long, scary-music song.  Actually, it's not that long, but that's beside the point.

I've come to grips with the fact I'm a masochist.  Reading horror is just one of those things.  I'm terrified, but I can't look away.  And the book is really well written.  I haven't noticed many--if any typos.  And that's been a problem with self-pubbed and trad-pubbed books alike.  I like the character and the problem that's risen up.

And, because it's so good, I can't stop, but it's scary so I want to, but I really, really really want to read, but I got to get up tomorrow morning--in a few hours--to put the trash by the road and...

And now it's 1am and I can't sleep.  I've been off the melatonin since November and this is the first time I've had trouble sleeping since then.

Stupid insomnia.  Stupid scary awesome book.

Make It Count

Ever wonder what people did before social media, television, mass agriculture, fitness clubs and WalMart?

I did.  Sometimes.

And then I realized, people were too busy trying to farm or make a living.  They didn't need social media, television, or the grocery store.

They broke their backs making their living. They didn't live long.  Usually between 30-40 is the average.  Would you have known your grandchildren?  Grandparents?  How old would you have been when you lost your parents?

Every day counted.  Every day you worked was a day you got fed.  You went to church on Sundays, probably.

It's easy to say, "Oh, I'm going to do such and such and such before I die."

Jesus only had thirty-three years of life on earth.  By the standards of the day, it was a full life.  During the Middle Ages, you had about forty years if you were a serf/peasant.

If you knew you were only going to live between thirty and forty years, because it was the average of the day, what would you do?

Someone made a comment last night that kids were getting pregnant younger and younger.  I said that it's going back old school.  People are getting married and having babies at thirteen, and dying at thirty.

Sometimes I wonder how bad of an idea that really is.  If you were only going to have a short amount of time, you're too busy trying to live to think about dying.

I wish I had the book with me (I'm at Amanda's), but in Stephen R. Lawhead's The Spirit Well, a character asks why the Egyptians were so obsessed with death.  You're familiar with the mummification process aren't you?  It's a long, drawn-out process, and it works like nobody's business.  It's in preparation for the life after death.

The character being asked the question answers, it wasn't about death.  "They were obsessed with life."

THAT made me stop.  Life.  Not death.  Life.

“Seize the day, whatever's in it to seize, before something comes along and seizes you.” 
― Lloyd Alexander, The Arkadians

So happy New Year!  Make your years count.

My Year in Books

I've read 150 books/stories this year.  The stats are as follows:

Length
Long/Medium:  140
Short: 10

Format
Kindle/eBook:  68
Print:  82

Most Read Genre:  Historical Romance, specifically Regency-era.

Other Genres:  Contemporary romance, paranormal romance, fantasy, children's/YA, children's/Ya fantasy, 1 literary, cozy mysteries, and some nonfiction

Longest Book:  Beyond the Shadows by Brent Weeks (720 pages), Fantasy, excellent conclusion to NIGHT ANGEL

Favortie Books of the Year (In relative order of which I read them)
Candide by Voltaire
Education of a Wandering Man by Louis L'Amour
A Matter of Magic (Mairelon the Magician & The Magician's Ward) by Patricia C. Wrede 
The Black Duke's Prize by Suzanne Enoch
A Garden Folly by Candice Hern
Her Scandalous Affair by Candice Hern
My Sparkling Misfortune by Laura Lond
My Royal Pain Quest by Laura Lond
Ten Things I Love About You by Julia Quinn
4 of the Cynsters (Devil's Bride, A Rake's Vow, A Secret Love, & All About Love) by Stephanie Laurens
The Fallen Blade novels:  Broken Blade, Bared Blade, & Crossed Blades by Kelly McCullough
Savage Cinderella by PJ Sharon
Taming an Impossible Rogue by Suzanne Enoch
The Blacksmith's Son by Michael G. Manning
Bah, Humbug by Heather Horrocks

Repeat Favorite Authors:
Stephen R. Lawhead (The Spirit Well)
Victoria Alexander (What Happens at Christmas)
Lloyd Alexander (The Kestrel & The Beggar Queen)

And let's not forget all the Moliere plays and I did read finish Pride and Prejudice.  Oh yeah, and I managed As You Like It.

Pretty decent, I think.

Happy New Year's Eve.  May the books be with you.

My Seamonkey Romance...Explained

When I mentioned My Sea-monkey Romance, my besties both said, "I was wondering about that."  So apparently, they do read my blog.  (Hi, guys!)  I talked about it with Lacey, since she's a writer and can understand writer- and Regency-speak.

It's weird talking about this story.  First of all, I didn't talk about it much before or during the writing or the researching.  All they knew was that it was a Regency romance.

I am a Regency-romance junkie.  This is relatively new, but it's there.  I thought, well, I read a bunch of Regencies, this ought to be a piece of cake.

WRONG!

I sat on the idea for several months.  Just a basic plot line sentence.  No setting, no character types.  Just a basic plot line sentence.

Hero finds Heroine's diary, reads it, falls in love.  That's it.  I sat on it for months.

I decided to use it for a Regency romance.  I wanted to write one and needed a plot.  Well, here was one.

And then things got sticky.  What kind of man reads a girl's diary?

A man (who perhaps drank too much) with a best friend saying, "What kind of chit leaves a diary in Hyde Park?  What kind of chit keeps a diary at all?  You intercepted a pair of spies' correspondence, it's all an act, blah blah blah."

I don't know how I feel about this story, honestly.  It's not, "Oh, look at my baby, it's so adorable."

It's, "Yeah, that's mine.  I don't know what happened."  Maybe I should say, "It's adopted."

Thus the nickname, "My Seamonkey Romance."

And "Seamonkey" is really supposed to be "Sea-Monkey" or "Sea Monkey."

So, the real title:  Just This Waltz

And it's about:  Verity and her sister have come to London for their Season.  On a stroll during the fashionable hour at Hyde Park, she sets her diary down, only to forget it there.  When she returns, it's gone.

Charles waited around for the book's owner to come back, but no one came, and it's going to rain.  But he doesn't want to leave it there...  So he takes it home.  His best friend notices it.  After a few too many drinks, he picks it up.  There's no name.  Oh wait, it's a diary!  He reads just enough to figure out who the diarist is.

But then he meets said diarist at a ball.  Curiosity piqued, he reads a little more as he's getting to know Verity.  He really should give it back.  But then, horrible secrets about her aunt's past comes to light, and they can ruin Verity and her sister's reputations and thus, the Season.

Obviously, there's going to be some waltzing.

Charles is a weird, forgetful male.
Verity is strange.

It's crazy, I know.  But I wrote it.  And you now understand why I'm reluctant to talk about it.

Also, I got a new Sea Monkey romance idea that I'll be using the code name for.  I haven't started it yet.  Probably won't until I daydream a little more of the story up, but I've already talked about it with Lacey.  It's not nearly as weird as Just This Waltz.

So there.  That's My Seamonkey Romance.

Writer's Block: Jadi Style

Technically, it's not a block.  It's more like, "I want to write this way, but the story's going that way, but I want to do it THIS way, but then I'd have to rewrite..."  And no writing gets done.

Two things happen here.

1)  I rewrite from the beginning.  Complete restart.  My first story, that got me writing?  STILL working on it.

OR

2)  I suck it up and continue to write, in the way the story is already going.  If I sit down long enough and pound keys, words will come.

This, at the moment, is about my first story.  One day, I will leave it on the shelf.  But it is not this day.  Meanwhile, so I can say I wrote, I'm blogging and trying to figure out a First Draft for another story.  I'm not restarting it.  That's going to have to be a suck it up.  First Story is the only one that gets re-starts and re-writes.  Which, since the main character, plot, and world building have all changed, calling it First Story is something of a misnomer.  I just used the same character names/personalities.

To Win Her Heart by Karen Witemeyer

Book: To Win Her Heart
Author: Karen Witemeyer
Rating: 4/5 stars/kisses/roses

This book reminded me why I don't read a lot of Christian romance. Preachy clean, not very humorous, and NOT Regency England. (If I didn't know it did, I wouldn't think Christian Regency romance existed.)

However, Hero was a blacksmith. The book was free for Kindle. Eh, I'll give it a shot.

Goodreads synopsis:  Having completed his sentence for the unintentional crime that derailed his youthful plans for fame and fortune, Levi Grant looks to start over in the town of Spencer, Texas. Spencer needs a blacksmith, a trade he learned at his father's knee, and he needs a place where no one knows his past. But small towns leave little room for secrets...

Eden Spencer has sworn off men, choosing instead to devote her time to the lending library she runs. When a mountain-sized stranger walks through her door and asks to borrow a book, she steels herself against the attraction he provokes. His halting speech and hesitant manner leave her doubting his intelligence. Yet as the mysteries of the town's new blacksmith unfold, Eden discovers hidden depths in him that tempt her heart.

Levi's renewed commitment to his faith leads Eden to believe she's finally found a man of honor and integrity, a man worthy of her love. But when the truth about his prodigal past comes to light, can this tarnished hero find a way to win back the librarian's affections?

Heroine:  Um, deluded, thinking education and refinement solves all brutish problems & pacifist.  As much as I pride myself on my intelligence, talking doesn't always work.  Otherwise, she's really nice.  Tender-hearted.  Learns quickly.  Smart.  Spunky.  Typical Miss living in a man's world.  Oh, and she's poison to flowers.  She makes a fine press, but she's not allowed around them when they're alive.

Hero:  Blacksmith.  Accidentally killed someone.  Spent time in prison for it.  Came back to Jesus like a prodigal.  Oh, and he has a lisp.  He has a great vocabulary so he can avoid s sounds.  Pretty likable even if he doesn't talk that much.

The Blow-Up*:  I cut my romance teeth on Victoria Alexander.  Her blow-ups are huge.  It always disappoints me when a romance book doesn't have a good one, if it has one at all.  In theory, you would think the blow-up would be when his secret past as a prizefighter comes to light.  While that does create a mini blow-up, it's not the blow-up.  I won't say what the blow-up is.

Overall:  Kinda cheesy, but romance is supposed to be.  Kinda preachy (okay, really preachy), but it's indicative of Christian fiction.  Hero met Heroine, they connect, and go through some stuff and then they go on to live happily ever after.

I've reviewed 2, maybe 3 books this year.  Why in the world did I take the time to review this?  

I liked it, would even recommend it.  It kept my attention and it didn't take me long to get through it.  Overall, I was pretty pleased with it.

*The Blow-Up is the part in a romance book or movie where you don't think the hero and heroine will wind up together.  It's also referred to as a Big Misunderstanding or The Big Fight, etc.  It's at the end right before the Big Reconciliation.

The Blacksmith Thing:  I have my own character who's vocation is smithing in my fantasy WiP.  I have a soft spot for smiths.

We're Different

I'm something between a sexist and a feminist.  I believe in equality and education for females.  I also believe in traditional gender roles.

Men, please be macho.  No wearing skinny jeans.  No wearing pink.  It's not manly, I don't care what anyone says.  When you find your feminine side, marry her.  She should be a person, who can train you properly.  Two flesh joined in one and all that.

Women, please be sweet and sensitive.  I don't think you should give up your 9-5 (I can't wait for mine) and stay barefoot and pregnant, but I don't think you should forget you're a woman.  You are the prettier, superior sex.  "God made man first, and then He had a better idea."  We were supposed to be Man's helper.  Help the poor idiots.

It takes both a man and woman to create a child.  Yes, I am aware of sperm banks, but a man's still needed for that, if only in the beginning.  Have they created artificial sperm yet?

"Girls have the same number of bones as boys, the same number of muscles, of vital organs. They sleep, breathe, eat, digest, grow, according to the same plan. So far there seems no reason why there should be any distinction of male and female. But as we come to study what is called special physiology we discover physical differences and reasons for their existence.

There are certain differences of form that are discernible at a glance. Men are usually larger than women. They have heavier bones and bigger muscles. They have broad shoulders and narrow hips, and have hair upon the face. Women have smooth faces, more rounded outlines, narrower shoulders and broader hips. In man the broadest part of the body is at the shoulders, in woman at the hips. This is significant of a great fact which will be manifest to you when you understand the functions of each sex. Although each has the same general plan of individual life, there are special functions which determine the trend of their lives. The man's broad shoulders are indicative that he is to bear the heavy burdens of life—struggles for material support—and woman's broad hips indicate that she is to bear the heavier burden of the race." 

Mary Wood-Allen, What a Young Woman Ought to Know (p. 79). Kindle Edition. (Public Domain Book)

The statements above are about 100 years old, maybe a little more.  Men and women are different.  But we need those differences.  We need each other.  We need manly men and girly girls.  We balance each other out.  Balance.  Remember that word?  What happens when you're unbalanced?  

You fall.

On a Brighter Note...

“If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.”
-Frank Zappa

I took my last final today.  I probably flunked it, but I don't care.  I know I passed the other one.  All I need is the one credit to graduate.

Now that I am done with college, at least for now, I am going to be totally honest.

I love learning.  I hate school.  I liked college, because it was new and shiny, but when the glitter wore off, it was just like high school all over again.  Except I wasn't the smartest in the class.  I didn't make any friends.  I didn't make any connections.  I just went to class everyday.

Not my smartest moves, but when I jumped off the deep end, I jumped pretty far.

So, now I'm left with the dreaded job hunt.  Still, an Associate's looks better than a High School diploma

College was starting to interfere with my education, I've said before.  Perhaps not here, but on other social medias.

Earlier this year, I read Education of a Wandering Man by Louis L'Amour.  He stressed the importance of his reading, but this man also traveled, worked all sorts of jobs, and even did a stint in the military.  He hiked across the desert.  Worked on boats.

And it was all part of his education.  I wish we still lived in that world.  But his world and the world I'm stuck in are two completely different worlds.

Few things sicken me more.  Education was good, but it wasn't everything.  And now, there's a more pressing need for experience.  Of which I have none.

Oh wait, this was supposed to be full of good news.

I've read 124 books this year!  That's good news right?  That's 24 more than last year, and 64 more than the year before. At least, I think it was 60 or so back in 2010.  Or was it 80?  Anyway, it's steadily grown.

I Hate This Part

Overall, I'd say the past 12-13 months were good for writing.

"Callis" (last late October-early November)
"The Traveling Companion" (last November to January, I think, maybe December)
 "My Fair Donor" (February, which later came out in May)
My Seamonkey Romance (October-November of this year).

Also, I got a draft of my First Story that stuck.  The file's creation date for Chapter 1 is September 20, 2012.  The file, I think, is a little older than that, but that's when it got moved to my jump drive.  So, September is when the draft actually stuck.

Here's how it played out.  I write short, which is not good for writing fantasy (or any other genre when you want to write novels).  On the one hand, I can tell a story in a few thousand words.  On the other, there's very little between short stories and novels.  Or there was when I first started writing in '05.

However, I'm stuck.

I've written about 60k for it.  30k for chapters 1-12, and the ending.  There's still some chapters in there that need writing between chapter 12 and the ending.  I have another 30k for backstory.  (Hey, it's fantasy; plenty span a few years.  Also, I'm still treating this story like a first draft.)  Some will go into the novel proper, the rest will go into a file so I can keep the story straight.

Okay, I won't lie, it's all getting stuck on there and I'll cut after I've written 80k for this story.  Maybe 90k.  Just so I can prove to myself I can do it.  Not in order perhaps, but I can write a full length novel amount of words in one draft.

Book Rant

“Fools have a habit of believing that everything written by a famous author is admirable. For my part I read only to please myself and like only what suits my taste.”
― Voltaire, Candide

I'm a weird reader.

I've never read Nicholas Sparks, Harry Potter, The Hunger Games, most other YA best-sellers, A Song of Ice and Fire (but I do at least own those and I will read them some day), Narnia.  I've only read The Fellowship of the Ring and I still have a bookmark in The Two Towers.  Never mind Tolkien's other works (again, I have them, but I don't know when I'll read them).  Oh yeah, I've never read James Patterson either.  But I did see Alex Cross and it's freaking amazing.  I watched The Hunger Games too.  Sorry, dystopias are not my thing.  Neither is YA.

I'm attempting Pride and Prejudice for the second time.   The first time, I got to Chapter 10, decided I wasn't interested and got rid of the book.  I got it again on Kindle--thank you Public Domain.  I'm over halfway through, but I guess I can be Team Darcy after I'm done.  Perhaps I'll try her other books.

My favorite author's Stephen R. Lawhead.  He has a pretty solid fanbase in the Reader World, but I think most non-readers wouldn't know who he was--unless they have a fan of his in their lives.  Even then?  Perhaps not.  And he gets reviews across the board.  People love him, hate him, or are merely indifferent.  Personally, I love his books.  They always make me feel like a better person.

The Spirit Well, his newest, only took me two days.  That's a record for me with his books.  My previous record was three days.  His books will give me a good hangover, but I don't get angsty about the next book.  Probably because I have so many other books to read.  After I've had my squee-fest, I'm ready to read something else.  Honestly, as I've said before about Bright Empires, I'm just really excited.  Like, oh my gosh, how is this going to end, and oh my gosh, I love the plotline (insert more fangirl squealing).

My favorite romance author is Victoria Alexander.  Same thing.  She's not like Nora Roberts whom everybody's heard of.  At least you can buy her books at WalMart.  Like Lawhead, she molded my tastes, set a standard for decency.

Keeping with the Alexanders, I think Lloyd Alexander is probably the best-known out of my favorite authors.  Yes, he's a children author.  (Oh yeah, I've never read Roald Dahl either, but I did get two of his books the other day.)

I think something's wrong with people who don't like Lloyd Alexander.  That's my Twilight.  If you don't like Lloyd Alexander, we can't be friends.  That, and Candide.  You can even dislike Stephen R. Lawhead, although, I'll still think your taste is deficient.

Not to say every LA book gets 5-stars from me.  I've given a few 3 stars.  But they're so much fun.  And he was interested in everything.  Welsh fantasy (thank you, SRL, for my obsession with all things Welsh-Celtic), Greek fantasy, French-esque fantasy, you-name-it.  Cats.  Westmark.  Gosh, I loved Westmark.

I think my favorite story was from The Foundling, and Other Tales from Prydain, "The Smith, the Weaver, and the Harper."

"And the Lord of Death fled in terror of life."

That is a powerful statement.

I've already said YA's not my thing.  I've read YA.  I even like some YA's, such as The DUFF by Kody Keplinger and the Inside series by Maria V. Snyder, but over all...  I'm more of a children's and middle grade reader.  And then of course, adult.  I don't know if it's because I'm still kinda fresh out of high school (although it's been two years) and not enough time has passed for me to want to re-visit those years, or if it's just not to my weird tastes, but I don't care for it.  I still look there.  I still pick up a book from time to time, but give me a Lloyd Alexander children's or an adult romance over that any day.

I'm in the minority in that.  Lots of people like YA.  I'm not very big into paranormal either.

LIE.  I've liked the few paranormals I've read, but they're not the first thing I reach for when I need a reading fix.  I go to a Regency romance.  I just don't go to it right away.

Other by Karen Kincy.  Freaking awesome.
Even Vampires Get the Blues by Katie MacAlister.  See above.
Immortal Coil by C. I. Black.  Dragons?  YES!

Wait, that's it?  Anyway...

My fantasy reads are a little more impressive.  I'm sure fantasy readers have heard of The Name of the Wind and The Wise's Man's Fear (long, but good).  The Night Angel trilogy by Brent Weeks (amazing).  Dragon Prince by Melanie Rawn (classic).

This year, my favorite fantasies were Broken Blade and Bared Blade by Kelly McCollough. The third book came out a few days ago.  I'm waiting to get my hands on it (probably Christmas).  Books like that remind me why I read fantasy, and they're not door-stopper long.  Aral Kingslayer is my fantasy book crush.  The fact he kind of reminds me of a romance hero isn't a coincidence.

I'm not one of those readers where books are never long enough.  I love short books.  I like long books too, but length is daunting.

I like books.  I like endings.  I like book hangovers.  I like when books end, so that means I can go to another book.

Several years ago, when I was in public high school, I was asked if I had a boyfriend.  I thought it was a stupid question.  It's small-town Wiggins.  Wouldn't they know if I was dating someone?

"You could be dating someone from another school."

"No," I said.

Someone I hated said I dated books.

Uhm, that's an interesting observation, but I always have more than one book going at a time, and I manage a lot of books in a year.  I'm never faithful to books, unless it's a romance, and that's because I don't have a bookmark in them long enough to cheat on them.  I use them to cheat on other books.

One year, I'm just going to read romance books, just to see if I'd be unfaithful to them if that was all I read.  I have cheated on romance books before, but it's a seldom occurence.

That's not weird, right?

Sometimes, I click on all the links on my sidebar.  You know, the ones for "My Fair Donor."  I go to all the websites to read reviews.

So far, the Barnes & Noble page is the only one that has a goodly amount of ratings/reviews, and they range from 2 stars to 5 stars.

And there was a new review.  And it was a good one.

I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.  I know I probably shouldn't have made that my debut self-published story, but I did and there's no calling it back.

The die is cast.

And I read reviews.  I don't know what I would do if one of those 2-star ratings actually had a review.  Would I kick myself for putting out a mediocre story?  Would I be offended in writer's indignation?

I don't know.   I suppose I should be grateful it's only a rating and not a review.

That being said, I've looked at my own ratings for books, and I almost never review.  Plenty of books get across the board rating and reviews.  A single book with get dozens and hundreds of reactions.

So, it's not personal.  The story didn't ring with them, I didn't do something right...

But when it's a good review...  Well, I like to look, just to see what people think.

I also like a reaction.  Love my work.  Hate it.  But don't be indifferent.

That's my new thing.  I don't know which of my characters will say it to their love interest, but someone will tell someone.

"I want your love.  I'll accept your hate.  But I will not tolerate your indifference."

And the reply, "As if anyone could ever be indifferent to you."

I think it's clever and sweet.  Just a snippet of dialogue, but it's there.  While it could work with Naren and Kamra, or my Seamonkey Romance (don't ask, I'll explain later), or a new story I'll write someday, I want that in one of my books.

I just got to make sure it's not in another book someone else wrote.

DinoResearch

I added a Dinos & Dragons pinboard on Pinterest, and I wanted to add my own research paper and powerpoint to the board.  I went to Scribd and uploaded both onto my profile.

Here they are!!!

DinoPaper

DinoPresentation

How to Be A (Decent) American

*be aware, I write from a Judeo-Christian worldview*

1.  Thou shalt be respectful.  It's okay to be opinionated, and we have the 1st Amendment for a reason.  That doesn't give you the right to be rude and disrespectful.


2.  Thou shalt pay attention in thine history class.  Benjamin Franklin was never a President, although he was a Founding Father.  He was also the one with the kite.  Columbus was Italian, but sailed for Spain.  He landed in the West Indies.  You should know what the West Indies are.


3.  Thou shalt not just complain, but thou shalt also do.  Yes, if you vote, you can complain BUT complaining's not enough.  If you really want things to change, petition.  Protest.  Be respectful and know your stuff, but don't just talk.


4.  Thou shalt work hard.  THAT is the American Dream.  People came to this country with nothing and worked hard and made a better life.  We're not even 300 years old.  We can still do this.


5.  Thou shalt be independent.  And by this, I mean independent of the Government.  The Lord may giveth and taketh away, and blesseth be the name of the Lord, but the government is not God.  This goes with #4.


6.  Thou shalt teach thine children right.  Don't leave it to the school systems.  You teach your kids right from wrong.


7.  Thou shalt understand that a healthy society has many components.  Home life, education, community, religion, security...  When one lacks, pick up the pace.


8.  Thou shalt read.  Most importantly, the Bible and Robert Fulghum.  Whether you're a Christian or not, the Bible has some good ideas.  Robert Fulghum isn't a Christian, but he's freaking amazing.  I have a lot of respect for him.  If the Bible can't be required reading, All I Really Need To Know I Learned in Kindergarten should be.  You shouldn't be allowed to leave government-mandated schooling until you've read him.


9.  Thou shalt remember to be human.  You are not a mindless drone.  You are not simply a cog in the wheel.  You are you.  Make mistakes, and forgive yourself for them.


10.  Thou shalt never be comfortable.  Humanity has always tried to be something or find something greater to be or believe in.  Dream.  Aspire.  Pray.  Grow.