Thursday, October 26, 2017

So Far

I've been home a week.  I did wind up packing up my car when I got back from Chicago.  I got home last Thursday around 10:30pm broke, tired, and just ready to be home.


So, I didn't realize how long it would take me to get to the offsite parking spot, and how long it would take to get a ride to the airport.  I did make it there, and then got a Lyft to the airport.  I got through security okay...

And missed my flight.  Luckily, I was able to get on the next one no problem.  It was my first time flying.  It was a bit like a roller coaster, except when you leave the ground, holy shit you're not attached to anything.

I get to O'Hare, and had to get an Uber to the Motel 6 (yes, I used both in the same day!) because I couldn't figure out where the shuttle was, and then I had problems with finding the Uber driver.  By the time I got to my room, I decided I wasn't leaving it again.  I chilled in the room grateful I'd brought snacks.

The next day, I got up early and used the shuttle to get back to the airport to take the El into the city.  My first stop was The Field Museum.  When you walk in, Sue the T-Rex is the first thing you see.  I was so happy, because that's the only real reason Chicago is even on the list of places I want to visit.  Because, Dresden Files.  Anyway, I spent 4, nearly 5 hours in this museum.  I loved it!  I want to go back.

I got out well after lunch time and decided to try the bus lines.  Eventually, I made it to the Irish pub I wanted to visit.  I hadn't eaten all day, I was starving and damn that shepherd's pie was delicious.  And then I went back to my motel room.  It wasn't much, but I spent a day in Chicago.  Not much of one, and I hated that I couldn't do more, but there's only so many hours in a day and all that.

The next morning, Thursday, I got up at 4, to be ready to take the shuttle for 5, to board the plane a little after 6, take off was a little after 7, and we arrived back in Dallas a little before 9:30.  I managed the shuttle back to the offsite parking, gassed up my car, and headed back to Corsicana.  Upon arriving, I ate something and just decided I really really really wanted to be home.  I packed up my car and headed out.

You know the rest.

But the museum!  Sue!  The other animals!  The fossils!  They have a dimetrodon!  And all these other fossils!  And diaromas!

Also, Jurassic World:  The Exhibition is there until January.  I don't know where it's going after that.  But it's amazing!  So lifelike!

Yes, I like exclamation points for this.  It was my first time in that sort of museum, first time out of the Bible Belt, first flight, first time in a Motel 6...

What I learned:



While I know I've had the idea that I'm going to travel solo, because if I wait for anybody to do anything with me, I'll never get to do anything, I don't know if I want to make a habit out of solo travel.  I can and will if I have to, but I won't make it a point to go solo.

That was my thing.  My last fling before going home to resume my life of mediocrity.  I tried in Texas.  The one thing I needed was time, and that was the one thing I didn't have.  And I'm already not a patient person to begin with.

My life isn't that great.  I'm 25, living at home, feel ugly most of the time, with hard to manage hair, going to be an old maid with a slightly caustic (heh, just slightly) personality....


Saturday, October 14, 2017

The Beginning of the End....of my quarter life crisis

I bought a plane ticket to Chicago.  I have a motel booked.  I reserved a parking spot for off-site parking.

It will not work out in Texas.  The short version is, I miss my family.

The truth?

-I can't afford it with roommates.  *Also, roomies smoke pot and I don't want to go to jail in a drug bust.  Parse that how you will.

-I sure as hell can't afford it on my own.

-I miss my stuff.  My computer, my bed, etc.  I loaded up my car with whatever it could carry, and took off.  The rest of my stuff was supposed to follow me, but hurricanes.

-I miss going to Chick-fil-A on a regular basis.

But first, I am going to Chicago.  Today was my last day at the Ennis Tractor Supply, and I have two days to pack the rest of my stuff before I leave for Chicago.  When I return on Thursday, I may pack up my car and leave, or I may wait.  I'm coming back early enough to leave on Thursday though.  We shall see.

Saturday, August 26, 2017

Female Seeking...

So, the cousin and I had a deal that if I didn't meet someone by my next birthday in real life, I'd sign up on a dating site.  My birthday is Thursday.

Internet dudes....oh no, serial killers!  Skin-stealers!

Never mind that most of the couples I know aren't anything to be envious of.

I'm pretty sure I've done this before, but I'll have to look.  But let's see, if I were really honest about what I wanted:

Victor Barinov from Bite Me by Shelly Laurenston.  I mean, seriously, every time I read that book, I swoon.  He's just so perfect!  Actually, he has an anti-perfection agenda, but still.

-Must be sweet.

-Accepts the fact I'm an asshole, but makes me wish I were less of one.

-Must like Elton John, and MASH, and all sorts of things.  You know, we need to have some stuff in common.

-OR, if we don't have much in common, must be useful, like a mechanic or carpenter.  If he can't talk books with me, he can at least build me bookshelves or be able to change the oil in my car and keep it running because I know shit about cars.

-Must kill the bugs without being a jerk about it.

-Monogamous, because I feel like nowadays I have to say that.

-Scottish maybe?  Complete with accent and kilt!  ;-)  Wishful thinking I know.  ::sigh::

My cousin's been asking what sort of person I want.  The truth is, I don't know.  Some people I take to right away, and others take forever for me to get used to.  It just depends.

Honestly, I still don't want to get my hopes up.

You ever see those forever alone memes?

Thursday, August 24, 2017

Welcome to Texas

I picked up and left Mississippi.  I am now residing in Corsicana, Texas.

I didn't break down and cry at the thought of being so far from my family.  Not yet anyway.  I'm seeing pictures of my godkids on Facebook and I miss those little boogers.  I want mom's cooking, and talking about just about damn near everything with my kid brother.

I transferred with the store I work for, so I don't have to look for a job.  Not yet anyway.  My GM in Gulfport went through a lot of trouble to make sure I had a job when I came out here.  It would seem very ungrateful of me to hurry up and find something else.

All that being said, I didn't come 8 frigging hours from home to just stay in retail.  Honestly and truly, the whole point of coming out here is for better work.  Period.

I have a degree dammit!  But all that aside, I met a lot of the staff at my new work, and they seem great.  There's a full time position available too.  My line of thinking is this:  if I can nab that full time position, I'll stay through Christmas before looking for a new job.  If not, screw it, and keep looking now.

Does that make me sound petulant?  I don't want to be.  I do want to be able to afford to live on my own.  They have some great places out in Ennis.  I got lost yesterday looking.  It was fun.  Trust me.

So, here I am, exactly a week before turning 25, 8 hours from home living with my cousin and some of her people.

My quarter life crisis, y'all.

Monday, May 1, 2017

I'm Still Here

I know, I know, it's like I disappeared.  I'm still here.  I want to go back to myself.

The girl who was supposed to be a fantasy author.

The girl who could read 120+ books/year.

The girl who dreamt of other places other than her hometown.

The girl obsessed with the Celtic mythos.

I'm going to be 25 this year, and I feel like I have nothing to show for it.

I barely made reading challenge this year.

I didn't make an Easter post--hard to when I've mostly walked away from my faith.  Although, I'm a little drunk right now, and I'll admit that tonight was the first time I've written in my prayer journal since January.

I want to write again.

I want to read again.

I want to leave Mississippi--even if I don't know where that'll be.

I want something, anything different.

My complacency, I think, has been slowly killing me.

I want to get back to myself.  I wasn't always this way.  And I don't want to be this way.

I have written a little bit, but there's more to add to that.